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Obituaries

Mary J. Toschi (88)

Mary J. Toschi (88), a vibrant soul whose laughter and homemade pasta could light up even the darkest rooms, has closed her kitchen for the final time. On March 19, 2024, Mary passed away from a short-term illness in her hometown of Madera, California, surrounded by the rich aromas of her life well-lived. Born on August 24, 1935, to Andrew and Angelina Gotelli, who were part of Madera's bustling Italian immigrant community, Mary's first words may have been in Italian, but she quickly found her voice in English, much to the relief of her grammar school teachers.

After graduating from Madera Union High School in 1953, Mary did more than snag a diploma; she caught the eye of Paul Toschi Jr., and together, they embarked on a 42-year-long marriage that was as spicy and delightful as her signature dishes. While Paul sometimes dared to enter the kitchen with his own culinary creations, it was always Mary's seasoned hand that stirred the pot of life, creating a home that was both a refuge and a social hub.

Mary's heart was home to many, especially her children: sons Gary Toschi and his wife Kelley of Bakersfield, Roger Toschi, and her daughter Andrea Devine, both of Madera. Her affection was a well-tended garden from which her grandchildren Hayden, Derek, Robby, Desirae, Samantha, Danielle, Madison, and Dylan plucked memories of joy and wisdom. The younger sprouts, Gavin, Olivia, Everett, Bennett, Harlan, McCoy, Nova, Jameson, Avalynne, Emma, and Scotti, knew her as the cherished great-grandmother who could make a simple hug feel like a masterpiece of love.

Mary's prelude was composed by her parents, her loving husband Paul, her brother Cuerino Gotelli and his wife Angie, her sister Norma Prosperi and her husband Albert, her sister-in-law Dolly Deniz and her husband Johnny, and nephews Steve Gotelli and Steve Lee. Their absence only amplified the beauty of the legacy Mary continued to compose with each day she lived.

Mary's life was a symphony of community involvement and friendship. She was a member of St. Joachim Catholic Church, the Italo-American Club of Madera, the Madera Historical Society, the former Teddy Bears organization, and the Red Hat Society. Her bridge games were less about the cards and more about the camaraderie, laughter, and the occasional good-natured bluff.

Traveling with Paul, Mary explored the world, but her heart always had a return ticket to Italy. These trips were more than vacations; they were pilgrimages to the source of her heritage, where she undoubtedly argued that her sauce was as authentic as any nonna's.

Mary was the personification of friendliness, always ready with a warm smile that made you feel like you were the most important person in the room. Her thoughtful gestures, whether a plate of cookies or a listening ear, spoke volumes of her gentle spirit. She was the type of person who'd laugh at your jokes even if she'd heard them a hundred times before to make you feel like a stand-up comedian.. “007” was a term of endearment given to her by the kids in the neighborhood for her all-knowing presence as the neighborhood mother watchdog. Her nightly shout of “ Gary, Roger, Andrea, come home” still haunts the evening dusk arrival.


As we say 'arrivederci' to Mary, we celebrate a life that was a masterclass in love, laughter, and the art of a well-timed joke. Her memory will continue to be a beacon of joy and a reminder that the best things in life aren't things at all but the moments shared with a friend like Mary. She taught us that life, like good pasta, is best when it's a little al dente—with just enough bite to make it interesting.

So, while the pots and pans may have cooled, Mary's legacy will continue to simmer in the hearts of all who were lucky enough to know her. And if laughter is truly the best medicine, then Mary J. Toschi was our best doctor. Ciao, Mary, thank you for every smile, every meal, and every moment.


Visitation will be on Tuesday, March 26, 2024, from 3 PM to 6 PM at Jay Chapel. Funeral Mass will be Celebrated on Wednesday, March 27, 2024, at 12 Noon at St. Joachim Catholic Church. Private Entombment will be at Calvary Cemetery Mausoleum.

Remembrances may be made to Valley Children’s Hospital Heart Center or St. Agnes Hospice.

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